10 year high school reunion eh? sheesh, i am O-L-D!
approaching my 29th birthday (in exactly 20 days), i keep thinking that eventually life slows down... right? hmmm, if present circumstances and previous experience are any indicator, that assumption is entirely incorrect.
but back to the reunion and 10 years ago, when i was 18, young and stupid. i will say this, the Hastings class of 2002 hasn't changed much overall - you still have the stereotypical clicks (geeks, choir kids (gleeks by today's standards, jocks, and so on), and each click was well represented, which i thought was pretty awesome. this was not one of those reunions where only a select few show up, and they all pre-planned it. it was tons of fun to see so many old friends and how much everyone had grown up. unfortunately, there was still a bit of residual high-school-ism left in the crowd (i.e. one girl ,who was deemed popular back in the day, refusing to talk to one not-so-popular girl {yes, i did insert myself in that one, it was just too painful to not say something}, someone smoking weed on the bus ride back {c'mon we're almost 30!}, etc.), and that made me a little sad.
and that part really got me thinking - people who haven't really moved on, from high school, college, a girlfriend/boyfriend, whatever. it makes my heart hurt a little to see that some people seemingly have not been able to move forward. i had a very good friend in high school and college who used to call me out on this all of the time - move on, stop being so "high school", don't dwell on things... it's true, we should all move on, but it appears not everyone has...
sadly, i think there are more than a few people out there that cannot move on. dwelling on their past has become the drug with which they use to deal with their present and/or future.
no one's "present" is perfect, but lemme tell you, your past is a myriad of distorted memories and rose-colored glasses, and cannot be totally trusted. i caught myself on this one recently :) Ryn and i will have known each other for 10 years in September, and i am super psyched to celebrate such a fun landmark with him!! since i've been thinking about our history together, i started to recount our story, how we met, how we started dating, etc. to jog my memory a bit i pulled out some old journals and was absolutely shocked at what i found - quite a few of my memories were totally inaccurate compared to what i wrote about all of those years ago. i'm only 28 and my memory has already started to fail me!
perfect example: at one point i started to count up all of the boys i had dated (i was always so proud that i didn't start dating until 17 and have been with Ryn since i was 20-21, so, how many boys could possibly fit in that short period of time?), and i was mortified at how high the number was. what?!? how is that even possible? i don't remember dating so many boys! but it's the truth and such a great reminder of how much our minds can change history a bit, remember what we want it to, maybe forget a little bit of the things we wish didn't happen... but really i think sometimes that's a good thing - how could we possibly survive a life of remembering every little thing we've ever done, good and bad? oh i am sure there are those out there who have a memory like that, but luckily, i am not blessed with that "curse" :) i mean, how terrible would it be to remember your birth? YUCK! ;)
okay, now i have totally drifted off into nonsensical speak, mainly rambling, but i really did have a point. the person i was 10 years ago is not the person that i am today. the crazy girl that i was 5 years ago is not even close to the woman that you will meet today. the kelly of yesterday is pretty close to the kelly of today, but even that is changing. what i am thinking is that - since we are all changing constantly (and hopefully) growing as a person - how can i possibly make a judgement about what some of these people from high school have become? really i have no idea and how prideful of me to think i could determine that! now yes, i admit, there are some people in life that have time and time again shown their true character (which is not so great), but i would venture to say that those are few and far between.
phew, one loooooooooong post, eh? alright, so here's the short version: your memory will fail you, add to that the fact that we're all changing constantly, i say stick with how someone's character speaks about them, and go with that. and if you still can't tell? well, then maybe just let it go...
it's okay to leave some people where they belong - in your happy, rose-colored past :)
